It’s a surreal moment when you take some time to sit and reflect on your life. That moment can be scary, sad, encouraging, and hopeful all at the same time - and that’s okay. The thing that we have to realize about life is that it’s going to change… daily. We can try to control it as much as possible but lets get real - we’re not in control. If we’re in control of anything it’s our thoughts and reactions to the things we cannot control.
It makes no sense to worry about things you have no control over because there’s nothing you can do about them, and why worry about things you do control? The activity of worrying keeps you immobilized. - Wayne Dyer
My life from an outside standpoint looks very similar to what it looked like roughly two years ago. Again I’ve been greeted with huge changes in my personal and professional life. I’m enduring losing someone close to me but I’m also blessed with an opportunity greater than I could have ever imagined. Sometimes I have to do a reality check with myself and be like “Is this really my life?”. For the most part that has an incredibly positive notion to it, but sometimes that reality check does bring sadness because my life isn’t exactly how I had pictured it would be right now. So maybe there is an element of disappointment, a battle within myself of personal failures that lead me to the point I am now.
But there has been so much victory in my life during this period.
I’ve learned how to love in a way I never experienced before. I’m working at what essentially is my dream job, and they actually pursued me. I became an Aunt to two kiddos who brighten my day simply by saying my name. I’m debt free (minus personal debts). I’ve been humbled over and over again because for whatever reason, God chose to use measly me to do incredibly big things. I have the type of friends that are legit, super-true and loving. And if this year has taught me anything, it’s taught me extreme grace - giving and receiving it.
I’ve changed because of what I’ve experienced in the last couple of years. I’ve failed miserably at a lot of things, but those failures have made me stronger. I find more value in my worth and purpose in this world. And I’m more confident in who I am as a person and a professional.
I am by no means perfect or reached the “me” I want to eventually become - but I feel like I’m making steps in that direction.
Trust me, I hate change just as much as the next person. It’s hard, it’s annoying, and sometimes it’s heartbreaking - but I believe the ability to change is essential to our individual progress which in turn furthers the progress of society as a whole.
The world hates change, yet it is the only thing that has brought progress.
- Charles Kettering